Republican presidential candidates are tripping all over themselves to show us how excited they are to catapult the U.S. back to the stone ages with talk of revoking our right to birth control, annulling gay marriages and aligning U.S. law with biblical standards. Don’t know if that includes reintroducing slavery or requiring impregnated women to marry their rapists and carry their babies to term but I’m not eager to find out. That’s why I’m voting for Burrito Jones.