I am typing this post as I balance two infants with my feet. The twins are home, finally, after an eternity at two different hospitals and a half-dozen different brands of plastic NICU boxes. So you’ll excuse me if I’m brief.

New product is coming here! I need you to buy the hell out of it, babies need a lot of diapers apparently. Here are the details:

Did you know sleep is optional? You don’t need it. My old boss was right, she was goddamned right.